Within the pages of the book “Amor In Vitro”, the author writes and dedicates a letter to the donor who changed her life. With sincere and emotional words, this writing takes us on a journey of gratitude and reflection, as well as longing for a world where science and love intersect to achieve Claudia´s dream.
To the most generous man in my life, after my father who gave me life; you, without asking for any material possession in return, gifted me the greatest spiritual treasure - your seed - so that I could become a mother.
Endless gratitude for your act of blind love; you didn't know I would be the fortunate recipient. You did as Saint Matthew said in chapter 6, verse 3 of the Gospel: "But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing." You will never come to ask for compensation, nor did you demand anything in return, nor did you publicize your action on social media. May God bless you and your family, the lineage to which my baby belongs, even though they may never meet or spend time together.
I sought permission for Santiago to arrive energetically in a family constellation therapy because he carries your genes and stories of the past that are being reconfigured with the environment of love in which our son grows. I don't know who you are, only that your ancestors are from a place where they dance the tango, your blood type, the color of your eyes and wavy hair, your height and weight, a lawyer by profession. A spoken portrait of a handsome young man, slender, with fair skin, someone I would have liked to get to know if I were younger. I trusted the doctor's experience, who assured me that you are a healthy, intelligent person with a good heart. In Santiago's face, I see gallantry, tenderness, and happiness, although I don't know if he resembles you; he didn't inherit your gray-green eyes, but instead, his are brown with dark gray, and his gaze is transparent.
If we were to encounter you physically, maybe we would recognize you, or perhaps not. However, I am sure you would feel proud of having decided to be a life donor and help Santiago exist, as he is a being full of light. I am convinced that he has an important mission in the world and that in the future if he were to search for you, it would be to thank you for being his progenitor, even though by law, they may not have had the opportunity to discover each other, nor could he call you "dad" while knowing your face, but rather guess it through the mirror.
Science allowed us to become a family in this way. Most likely, you will form a family, whether through marriage or not, with a woman of your choice and have more children through traditional means or also through cell donation. I wish for you to be a happy, responsible, and loving father. Although you may not know more about us than in some dreams, know that we love you. Your obligation is not to search for us; your goodwill ended when you handed your sample to the laboratory after undergoing many tests to ensure you were a suitable candidate. What happened afterward would be the work of destiny, a miracle of the universe.
If one day you need something that enriches your soul, I hope you find someone who, in the same selfless way, helps you transform your life for the better, as you have transformed mine. Thanks to people like you, there are people like me who choose to journey the path of unconditional love with mastery.
Claudia Cervantes
Cervantes, C. (2022). "Amor In Vitro" [In Vitro Love]. Mexico City, Mexico: Penguin Random House Grupo Editorial.
This letter shows that love goes beyond genetics. At Ingenes, we are here to help you fulfill your dream of being a mother, with the use of high-complexity treatments and unconditional support in each step of your process. If you would like to get your own copy of the book by Claudia Cervantes, click here.